Artist // Photography
- United States
- Deviant for 15 years
- She / Her
Badges
My Bio
Current Residence: Lost Bagels
deviantWEAR sizing preference: XXXXXXXXXXXL
Favourite genre of music: K: Anything but rap :/
Personal Quote: W: "Free abortion!" -punches stomach-
deviantWEAR sizing preference: XXXXXXXXXXXL
Favourite genre of music: K: Anything but rap :/
Personal Quote: W: "Free abortion!" -punches stomach-
Tools of the Trade
Pencil and paper/A keyboard
Other Interests
Roleplaying :D
Reread. The. Entire. Thing.
0 min read
I took the time to write it. And rewrite it. And erase it and then write it all over again. You can take the time to read it.
"Setting rules for the roleplay, sort of."
This is ESSENTIAL! It is about the setting and characters. You always have to keep the things in this journal in mind, especially when you're writing for the characters that multiple people control(such as the king, soldiers, etc.)
There are constantly discrepancies between our posts, so we need some background information about the setting!!
Here are the basics:
- The current country they are in is called BELBRII.
- The city they are in is KYRIUS.
- The king's name is
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Profile Comments 13
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So, I was cleaning out my closet the other day, and as I was throwing out piles of PE sports packets I got to thinking about the story. Some of us have expressed a disinterest due to lack of participation on everyone's account, and that's all right, but I think we could have gone much farther with it.
Here's me, saying that I will 'make a post' within the next few days and put it up, continuing this forgotten tale.
And if you find yourself reading this, do please add something.
P.S. Whoever was supposed to write a review for Rose is a slacker!
Willow
Here's me, saying that I will 'make a post' within the next few days and put it up, continuing this forgotten tale.
And if you find yourself reading this, do please add something.
P.S. Whoever was supposed to write a review for Rose is a slacker!
Willow
You talk..to yourself? Cx
No, it's just that there are four people sharing an account. Codenamed Otter (me), Willow, Wyvern, and Kitty. And we tried to collaborate on this story, buuuuuuut it isn't working out. The novelty of writing a story together is gone since we're all tired of having to wait for other people to make a post. x_x
XD We are four different people.
To Whoever Wrote About Arathen,
Actually, you stole his secret attributes. His main flaws, which you pretty much already mentioned, are his hatred for humanity, his short temper, and his incredible pride. And...yes. I'd just thought I'd point it out that you read my character very nicely. C:
Good job.
-Kitty
Actually, you stole his secret attributes. His main flaws, which you pretty much already mentioned, are his hatred for humanity, his short temper, and his incredible pride. And...yes. I'd just thought I'd point it out that you read my character very nicely. C:
Good job.
-Kitty
No offense, Kitty, but I don't think it's fair that you tell people their reviews are wrong and stuff when you haven't written one yourself. It kinda annoyed me ever since we started the review thing and you keep reminding me to make a post for Dmitriy, but we keep reminding you too and you won't write two. Everyone else has except for you.
And you're not supposed to comment on critiques. You either accept their advice or ignore it. You don't have to refute the review. The other three of us are just trying to give advice, it's not like we plan on arguing it.
This isn't an attack, we just sayin' how it is. :/
- Wyvern and Otter
And you're not supposed to comment on critiques. You either accept their advice or ignore it. You don't have to refute the review. The other three of us are just trying to give advice, it's not like we plan on arguing it.
This isn't an attack, we just sayin' how it is. :/
- Wyvern and Otter
About Arathen,
Your portrayal of the universal elven character is sound. Also, the mentioning of his former slavery places a strong foothold for a twist in his character. Furthermore, the physical description leaves nothing to be wanted.
However, he seems to have an unusual amount of pros to his makeup. As noted in the two quotes below, he seems to be lacking in nothing a hero is wanted of. The problem with this is that it leaves no room for a flaw that will make him a truly workable character. He will overcome all his obstacles, and he will have no endearment.
I think that such a flaw could be developed in his memories as a slave. This memory has the makings of the origin for a burning hatred of the human race, which would be a major factor in his decisions. His hatred spawns pride. Pride goeth before the fall. Not that he will fall, unless you so wish it. Think about it?
And where and why did he learn swordplay? One would think he had little need for a blade...it would not be unwise to annex this detail.
-sniff
"After all, he was strong in endurance and... everything...gifted and successful, even for an elf...elves were naturally extraordinary in intelligence, strength, and beauty...Arathen was even better...young, too."
"...overly handsome...also an excellent fighter and extremely quick-minded...most likely the best archer in the area..."
Your portrayal of the universal elven character is sound. Also, the mentioning of his former slavery places a strong foothold for a twist in his character. Furthermore, the physical description leaves nothing to be wanted.
However, he seems to have an unusual amount of pros to his makeup. As noted in the two quotes below, he seems to be lacking in nothing a hero is wanted of. The problem with this is that it leaves no room for a flaw that will make him a truly workable character. He will overcome all his obstacles, and he will have no endearment.
I think that such a flaw could be developed in his memories as a slave. This memory has the makings of the origin for a burning hatred of the human race, which would be a major factor in his decisions. His hatred spawns pride. Pride goeth before the fall. Not that he will fall, unless you so wish it. Think about it?
And where and why did he learn swordplay? One would think he had little need for a blade...it would not be unwise to annex this detail.
-sniff
"After all, he was strong in endurance and... everything...gifted and successful, even for an elf...elves were naturally extraordinary in intelligence, strength, and beauty...Arathen was even better...young, too."
"...overly handsome...also an excellent fighter and extremely quick-minded...most likely the best archer in the area..."